A day in the life--morning

What does a day in the life of a godly husband and father look like? Sometimes it is this crucial and simple question that is the one we don't want to answer because we know the answer will have to spark change in us if we truly call Jesus, "Lord." While I do not pretend to label myself "godly," yet a day in the life of a godly husband and father is accessible because Scripture gives it to us. As God as my help I want to strive to become a godly husband and father.

So I thought I'd just pick the three crucial times of the day, morning, supper and bed time and write out some thoughts about those times. I may write some thoughts about history and some about Scripture and some about the reality of 21st Century living. Hopefully I'll remind myself to keep striving for Christ and help you, too.

MORNING

The battle for the morning is won or lost the night before--I believe that with my whole heart. Jerry Seinfeld boils it down to a battle between our two inner selves, "night guy," and "morning guy." Night guy stays up and stays out. He doesn't care what sort of messy situation or tired state that he leaves morning guy in. That doesn't concern him. He just wants to have fun. Morning after morning, morning guy drags himself tiredly out of bed and tries to make a go of it at work and in the real world. He gets sick, makes new resolutions and generally tells himself that he's going to change. But night guy keeps staying up too late. Eventually, Seinfeld says, morning guy's only recourse is to go to work late often enough to get fired so night guy doesn't have any money left to go out with. This points up my first thought about the morning.

In order to get up at a decent hour (before the children), you have to know how much sleep you need. Then go to bed, allowing yourself the time you need to sleep.

I have never been a "morning person." I am a night owl. However, in an effort to be the person that I need to be I knew that I had to change. At first it was one failure after another, and I kept telling myself I had to "do devotions" when I was most fresh (later in the day). I found out that I could be fresher than I thought in the morning if I won the battle for a decent bedtime. I looked at the natural rhythms of life (it makes sense that God made us to sleep when it gets dark and to get up when the sun comes up, doesn't it? I know that makes it weird for people who live at the equator or in Alaska . . .). So while I am changing, I still have to change more.

In almost every case of depression that I have tried to disciple someone through, sleep patterns has been a part of the issue. Sometimes it was truly an insomnia--usually having its roots in apprehensions and fears about tomorrow (Matthew 6 addresses this fear issue). Sometimes it was just that old excuse about being a night person. Either way, the ongoing lack of sleep made the depression worse.

I wrestle a bit with winning this battle, so I am not preaching to you as much as myself. In order to get up by 6:00 a.m. (which does not seem unreasonable), I need to be asleep by 11:00. That means I need to be in bed by 10:30. I've got to have three hours in the morning before work begins for the day. Simple. But if I do not do this, one of two things happens: either I begin to operate out of a deficit (I get more and more tired as the week progresses) or I begin to (horror of horrors) oversleep.

You probably don't have the flexibility I do with what occurs throughout the morning. I work things out in my schedule to protect my mornings (in other words, I usually don't schedule things in the office until 9:00). I need to spend time alone in the morning to be ready to be with people all day long. We all need to have that time to meditate, pray and read Scripture. If I am not renewed of spirit, heart and body in the morning before the Lord, it's going to be tough day. It's the morning or not at all when it comes to this kind of soul-satisfying time alone with God.

I need to be returning from my run by 8:00 so I can connect (at least a bit!) with my wife and kids before I miss out (I hate it when I cut all the corners and wind up running out the door with breakfast in my hand). On the days when I oversleep or skip the run or fail to read Scriptures I live with such guilt. A man should own his mornings! I have come far on this in the last couple years, but I know I can do better--much better.

Finally, why? Why get up early enough to be able to accomplish important (if focused mostly on my soul's health), but (some would say) optional tasks? Because my people (family) need me, and yours need you. They need me to be sound-minded and spiritually refreshed. They need me to be seeking God. They need me to be physically healthy. They need me to be pursuing God so they get a sense of what it looks like to follow God. They need me to do God's will and to fight temptation. They need me to have good judgment and fresh perspective. They need me to live my whole life without remorse, regrets and the painful pattern of laziness. In fact, laziness is a factor that puts huge pressure on a marriage.

For me, the morning is the moments of solitude and refreshment that I must have to remain alive. God's Word, and specifically His lovingkindness, is better than life itself. God's creation is a reminder and a sign to me of His eternal attributes and power. God's presences is what you and I were made to enjoy.

So husbands, and dads, join me in this effort in faith to win the day by winning the morning. I'll write about the afternoons and evenings later, and I will remind myself again about why those moments alone with the Lord in the morning are so crucial later in the day.