I want more!

Sounds pretty American, doesn't it? More square feet, more horsepower, and more french fries in the value meal. More of everything!

But more of almost anything has always left me empty. More money? More friends? More days to live on this earth? I don't know. Is that what I really want? I definitely want to stay and experience life with family, love my wife, raise our kids, and stay "here," don't get me wrong.

But this life, broken and finite, doesn't offer anything that truly brings undying satisfaction. Even the sacred Christian answer, "relationships," don't bring satisfaction just because you have "more." I am reminded that Jesus wept when he had learned that Lazarus died. Why? As I've said in other posts, He knew he was going to raise Lazarus from the dead in like, 3 minutes. Why weep? Maybe because he knew that even if he did a MIRACLE, raising the dead to life, Lazarus was going to die AGAIN in a couple years. Maybe Jesus wept because he knew HE was going to have to die. I don't think so, though. I think he wept because sin and death were NOT the original plan. As Plantinga says it, this is "Not the way it's supposed to be" (check out his book, A Breviary of Sin).

My point? This world has NOTHING in it that will bring satisfaction to your heart and soul if you get more of it. More life? Paul said, "If I stay or go, it's all good" (my paraphrase). If I stay (he said), it is going to mean MINISTRY. Serving. Giving. Dying. Suffering. Building up the church.

One day we will see Him face to Face. No more weeping. No more jealousy, anger or pain. No more bitterness. No more misunderstandings, racism or selfishness. No more pride.

And so that's what I find my heart LONGING for today. More giving! More Dying! And that only takes place as I give Christ more of my fallen, broken, finite heart. Give it over to Him! Want what He wants! Less of me and more of You!

So this is what I want more of today. I want to give more of me away to God by pursuing a knowledge of Him and participating in the fellowship of suffering so that Christ will be glorified.

Why am I so BAD at this?

It's the only "more" that is "living water"--a fountain--inside me. It's the only "more" that satisfies.

Help me pursue You today, Lord!

Everything I need

I'm doing some studying this week getting ready to speak on this concept: there is nothing that I need for this life that does not come from God. Let me re-phrase that: anything that I am currently lacking in mind, spirit or heart can be and will be provided by God, and Him alone. He is everything I need for a strong mind. He is everything I need for a strong body. He is everything I need for healthy emotions. He is everything I need for life.

It's true that He can and does remind us of what we need through friends, so friends who follow God are crucial and necessary. My best friend in the world is my amazing wife who finds new ways every day to remind me of God's sufficiency. So in that sense we do need each other. But if friends would ever fail you or you'd find yourself somehow without them, He is everything I need for life.

Past relationships and hardships affect us and cause us to see life through certain lenses. We trust and mistrust people based on yesterday. We grow in understanding people's character and what roles we are to fulfill and how much of our hearts to entrust to others (or not). But no matter what you have faced in your yesterday (or this morning), He is all I need for life.

And as filthy as this world is in morality, you'd think you would need to help God, wouldn't you? There's stupidity and the throwing away of lives and the spending of self on all that is death. Wasting away these few days on drugs, addicted to anger and a hatred for all that is good. Even in the midst of this crooked and perverse generation, He is all that I need for life.

I wish that I could take credit for re-working the repeated phrase above from the text on which I'll speak. But I can't. 2 Peter 1: 3-4 that is translated into English in the precise way that I keep writing it above:

"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires."

I LOVE life. And life is this--realizing that there is NOTHING I need for life that doesn't come from God Himself. His promises are SO precious! He's all that I need for life.

Simply happy

What makes you happy? What "floods your soul with joy"? I have met people that would struggle for long periods of time to answer this question. The inspiration of my wife is what makes me stop and think about this. Otherwise, I would just walk through life with a smile on my face. She inspires me to think hard about what it is that keeps me happy. Here are a few thoughts on the subject . . .

• Living a life of genuineness and authenticity with my beloved wife. No secrets. No fear of confrontation. No avoidance. All of me all the time for all of her. We share everything. While I love sharing lots of things with others, too, I love how much that is just between us and God.
• Even more than that (imagine!), is knowing that I walk daily in right relationship with God. He has paid for my sin and calls me to live boldly within the relationship that He established and maintains. I glory in the grace of God! I can only have right and healthy thinking as my thinking dwells on His truth. Where I have emotional and physical health it is an echo of His mind and a gift from His hand.
• My children are amazing. I know there will be roads and bridges that we travail together in deliberate fashion. I know that I will have to be become weaker and weaker to depend more on God through prayer. I even know that there is heartache ahead--whether through "owning" hard moments or just letting go. Bring on the pain! God will be there with me in it. I embrace God's order and live with an understanding that they belong to Him (at least I think I do--talk to me in 8 years!).
• The simple list (random order):
  
• My favorite: pushing myself to surge in mile 4 of a 6 mile tempo run and feeling the air burn in my lungs in resistance to what I am forcing them to do. Push harder? Absolutely--throw the hammer down in mile 6. I love it! The only thing better? Finishing uphill and into the wind.
• The first cup of coffee of the morning. When I walk into the kitchen and my wife has the coffee ready. The first ingredient in her coffee is sacrifice, and it makes that coffee so rich and bold. Coffee store coffee pales in comparison to Nikki's!
  
• The colors and climate of fall. Monday: 85 degrees. Today: 55 and very windy. I cannot wait until the first frost, the first snow and my first sub-zero run.
  
• Sweet Tea. I don't want to brag, but I make the best sweet tea I've ever had (it's my blog).
• Correcting my kid's math homework. I love checking up on what I've told them to do. I especially love the look of security on their face when they delight in doing what they understood that they were supposed to do. It's like them saying everyday: I know that my place is with you dad--you're showing me how to do it. Thanks.
• My drive home along the Lake. I live along a Great Lake. When I drive home up our hill and see the Lake's mood of the day, I always wonder at God's creativity and generosity. Every day. I have lived near the same spot on this Lake for over 20 of my 37 years and it never gets old.
  
• When my wife has a hard issue to talk over. I love seeing and knowing her heart. I love that she would trust me with the inner-most places of her being. I love knowing her better than anyone. I love that Scripture (and God!) has already arrived in this place and gives us all we need to deal with hard stuff.
• My sister turns 50 today (edited, 10/12). Wow. I was born into a family of 7 kids. We're all still here, including my parents. As I read that, it looks morbid. I am reminded of a message I heard from James MacDonald this week: "The doctor cannot tell you 'if' you have a terminal disease--you have a terminal life. He can give you a handle on 'when' you may die, but not 'if.' You are going to die."
  
• "Every second of every day is a gift of life from God until He justly decides to stop giving them."
• My other sister delivered a baby boy, Nolan Thomas, into the world this week (her ninth child). Wooooooo! Praising God with her and her family.
  
• The depths of the wisdom of God. Every time I study the culture more I see that God has already spoken His truth to us and it it still the thing that every person needs. Whether it's a broken leg, a broken mind, or a broken family, God's Word says what you need and how you need it. God's Spirit makes it all real.

In closing, let me say that I believe you can only chose moment-by-moment joy when you stand right before God, and if you stand right before God you will choose moment-by-moment joy. I have a long way to go, and life is always moving. As God as my help I way that nothing will ever separate me from the love of God--not things past, present or yet to come.

Happiness

Is happiness different than joy? I have always heard people say that the two are different. Happiness is positive emotions that may flow from some recent circumstance. You know, the Brewers won again, the Custard Stand is serving my favorite as their "Flavor of the Day," you got a promotion at work and Grandma's cancer is in remission. That's happiness.

But joy, they say, is that positive mindset that you keep even when things go bad. This all used to make sense to me. Maybe, in general, it still does.

But the older I get, the happier I become. I'm not talking about an internal mindset, I am thinking about the gladness of heart that comes all the time because of my relationship with Jesus Christ and the certainty of my position in Him. I am forgiven. Let that sink in. And God has given me the privilege of knowing the most incredible woman in this world. I can hear from God through His Word and by His Spirit. God has opened my eyes to His fame and made me see how pitiful my attempts to get fame for myself have become. When I fail this afternoon or next week, God will hold me in His hands.

Let me include a list of things that I am happy about that I wrote in my journal about a year ago. They all come because of His resurrection. Happiness is:

• God created me from nothing. He saw my "unformed substance" and knit me together.
• God allowed me to experience an upbringing that centered on Him.
• God has forgiven my sin and helped me place my faith in Him. What if I died today? God is still good. He owes me nothing except death--he gave me life in His Son.
  
• God uses my little light to tell this world that He is reigning on His throne.
• God has chosen ME for good works (and he prepared them for me "in advance" of me even being here).
• God is granting an increasing measure of grace to constantly put to death the "flesh," and walk with Him in obedience.
• God has granted me the ability to see and comprehend literature and inspires me with the literary works of His servants through the ages.
• God has blessed me with an amazing wife and family. Though I often choose selfishly, He also empowers me to prefer their needs over my own and serve them.
• God has blessed me with the incredible privilege of embracing things that this world calls foolishness. Creation? I believe it. Miracles? I serve the God of them. Heaven? My hope is there with the Promise-Giver Himself.
• God matured my faith along the way from a timid "hope so," to a tenacious mature belief in His Son. I know that I utterly need the Body of Christ.
• God has opened my eyes to the joy of giving stuff (money) away.
• My life has purpose and meaning.
• Because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, when I die I am guaranteed a place in heaven with Him forever. One day I will posses a new body(as Christ was raised from the dead, I will be too!) and be physically present with Jesus Christ. What will that be like? This is reason to celebrate!
• God will use the life of the obedient believer (even mine) to bring more and more people into His family.

I have actually had people say to me that they "don't know what God ever did for" them. What!? Start with the above list and then add your own! How has God shown His love for you? The list is never-ending.

So we can haggle about joy and happiness. I can't imagine the two are very far apart. If the Brewers lose; if my job contains things I don't like, if my childhood was painful, if the tumor is malignant--blessed be the name of the Lord. I choose gladness.

So today, I remind myself again . . .